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Sexual and Emotional Healing for Church Leaders
Dan Hitz, Director, Reconciliation Ministries
Dan was in the ministry for eight years while still struggling with unwanted same-sex attraction. He entered Living Waters as a participant in 1999 after a “Jacob wrestling with God” season in his own life. Dan has been the executive director of Reconciliation Ministries since 2003, is an ordained minister through the International Fellowship of Christian Assemblies, and is a limited licensed professional counselor. He has served in leadership trainings and seminars in Southeast Asia.

According to various resources, 60-70% of pastors do not have someone they consider a close friend or confidant, 45% have experienced depression or burnout and desire a leave of absence from ministry, 60-70% are more insecure now than when they first entered the ministry, and 80% of ministers say their family is adversely affected by their ministry. With Christian workers facing such challenges, it’s easy to see how they may also be susceptible to sexual sins and addictions. In 2004, Christianity Today wrote that 37% of pastors say cyber-porn is a current struggle. As congregation members, it’s so easy to forget that our ministers are people just like us who struggle with life’s pressures and temptations.

The Lord has been planting an intense burden in my heart for some time now for pastors, missionaries, and church leaders who are struggling with their own hidden sexual temptations, sin and emotional pain. They are laying down their lives for those around them and yet dying on the inside. While all church members experience spiritual warfare, Satan seems to have special tactical weapons designed to take out ministry leaders. The effect on their families is devastating. The spiritual cost is intense. The ripple effects in their ministry are enormous. When a leader falls, it puts his/her entire family, walk, and work at risk.

Christian workers may have very limited resources for help. Finances are tight. Missionaries are often isolated in third world countries with limited opportunities for counseling or pastoral care. Pastors are hesitant to go to their own denominations for help and leery of participating in group settings where they may be seen and heard by others in their congregation. Without safe, confidential, Biblical help, many in the ministry grow weary, burn out, and fall deeper into sin; leaving their families and those they minister to an emotional train wreck.

For the first eight years of my ministry, I was trapped by intense temptations towards same-sex attraction and emotional dependency. With this internal struggle came hopelessness and depression. Often I felt like I was trying to minister to others with a chain around my own neck. I could speak from the pulpit and touch so many hearts but could find very few whom I could confide in, and no one who understood my internal struggle. At the very lowest point in my ministry, I wanted God to take me home and end this struggle before I hurt those I loved the most and those whom God sent me to serve.

It doesn’t have to be this way. God is raising up an army of skilled, confidential, Biblical warriors to walk side by side with wounded leaders and help them find the healing they need. Organizations like Barnabas Ministries and others were created to be a refuge for leaders in need. Reconciliation Ministries is also available for ministers struggling with emotional pain and sexual sin. Services include individual counseling and prayer ministry for those within traveling distance to this ministry, and webcam or phone counseling for those unable to receive counseling in person.

As I received healing in my own heart, my wife gained a “new husband” and my kids gained “a new dad”. My internal pain no longer spilled over onto my family or those I was ministering to. I began to walk into the freedom and healing in Christ that I helped others to obtain, but somehow seemed to be beyond my grasp. This wouldn’t have happen without members of His army who had a heart to help me as a pastor fight my own personal battles while leading my family and serving the Body of Christ.

If you are a pastor, missionary, or church leader who has been hurting on the inside and wishing you had a safe place to go for help with someone who understands the pressures of ministry, family, and sexual temptation; don’t struggle in isolation any longer. Call Dan Hitz at Reconciliation Ministries for help at 586.739.5114, or e-mail Dan at dhitz@recmin.org. All correspondence is strictly confidential.

If you would like more information about Reconciliation Ministries, or any of the ministries we offer, visit us on the Web at www.recmin.org, or call (586) 739-5114. You may also e-mail us at info@recmin.org. All correspondence will be kept strictly confidential.

Our office is located at 25410, in Roseville, Michigan 48066.

Reconciliation Ministries is an affiliate ministry of Exodus International, and uses many of the programs written by Desert Stream Ministries.